kadenza: (facepalm)
H: We sure did a lot yesterday, didn't we?

N: What did we do?

H: Well, let's see... you had your swimming lesson, we went out for pizza, we watched that guy jump from the balloon, we played Wii, we went to a store and got you a new bunk bed, we went to Ikea and you played in the balls, we went to Kensington Market and had tacos, then we came home and made cookies, and then you had a bath and went to bed.

N: But... we didn't do crafts. We didn't find jewels. We didn't plant a tree. We didn't do everything.

Lying fail

Jun. 29th, 2012 01:05 pm
kadenza: (facepalm)
Nat: Mummy, I finished my lunch. I put the whole thing in my mouth and it's now gone. I didn't put it in the green bin.
Me: Hmm... I think I might just check the green bin.
Nat: No Mummy! I said, I DID NOT put it in there!
Lunch: Oh hai, I'm in the green bin.
kadenza: (?)
last night

Nat: Mummy, why do you keep playing this game if you only ever lose?
Me: Well, I'm trying to get better.
Nat: But you only seem to be getting worser and worser.

Not much gets by this kid. Speaking of which, she finally asked me where Eor is, three months after his untimely demise. I just came out and said that he died. She asked why, but that's where I decided to draw the line on the truthiness, because she really doesn't need to know the details and/or develop a fear of raccoons. I also didn't want to tell her he got old and died, because then she'd maybe start worrying about the cats or my parents or something so I said I don't know, he just died. She accepted that. She asked if I was sad, and I said yes. She asked if it was because I loved him, and I said yes. Then she went off and put her green blanket on and said she was a turtle. So that went well.
kadenza: (ask dr stupid)
Nat and I had a brief conversation about genetics today.

Me: Nattie, where did you get those blue eyes?
Nat: Um... they must have been painted, I guess.
Me: Did you get them from Daddy?
Nat: No, I think you probably painted them.
Me: Ok, how about your blonde hair? Where did that come from?
Nat: Wellllll, I think I got it from some kind of craft room.
Me: And where did you come from, do you think?
Nat: [long pause] Some writing on a form.
Me: Oh, we filled out a form to get you?
Nat: Yeah, you filled out a form.

So close

Mar. 22nd, 2010 09:41 am
kadenza: (facepalm)
Marshall [pointing to pic of Obama in the paper]: Nattie, do you know who this is?
Nat: Hmm... I think it's the Numa Numa guy.
kadenza: (facepalm)
Kid 1: [singing] I wake up in the mo'ning feeling like P Diddy
Kid 2: Who's P Diddy?
Kid 1: No idea.
kadenza: (lowercase n)
Nat came hopping out of the storeroom straddling a roll of wrapping paper.

Nat: I'm riding... I'm riding a...
Me: [helpfully] A horsey?
Nat: [derisively] No, WRAPPING PAPER.
kadenza: (Sir Not-Appearing-In-This-Film)
Looks like Marshie was working on Nat last night while I was out at the knitting guild meeting.

The scene: This morning, all three of us in our bed.

Marshall [to Nat]: What's your name?
Nat: NATTIE!
Marshall: And how are you?
Nat: HAPPY!
Marshall: And how old are you?
Nat: ONE!
Marshall: And who's your favourite?
Nat: DADDY!
Me: [jaw drops]
Marshall: And who's upset?
Nat: MUMMY!
kadenza: (?)
Two Greek women, one old (OGW) and one even older (EOGW), stopped to prod and talk to Nattie in Shoppers Drug Mart yesterday.

EOGW: How much! How much!
OGW: She means, how old.
Me: Oh! Almost 11 months.
EOGW: Ft ft ft!
OGW: You ever see... My Greek Fat Wedding?
Me: Um... yes?
OGW: It's just like the movie! Ft ft ft!
Me: Uh... ok.

I have vague recollections of the movie, much of which was filmed right around here, but I have no clue what she was talking about or what it means. Anyone?

At least we straightened out the how much thing on the spot. At first I thought she wished to purchase my child.
kadenza: (fail)
The scene: I'm playing on my DS in the living room. Marshall is about to leave to go visit [livejournal.com profile] thatwasthedemo. Haven't seen the baby in a while.

M: Ok, I'm leaving now.
H: Where's Nattie?
M: She's here in the kitchen, eating her puffs on the floor.
H: I don't remember giving her any puffs.
M: OH MY GOD SHE'S EATING CAT BARF

This is definitely one for the baby book. OF SHAME.

Sportses

Jan. 21st, 2008 08:10 pm
kadenza: (phys ed)
I came up and found Marshall watching football yesterday. Our conversation went something like this.

H: So... they are trying to get from the blue line to the orange line, correct?
M: Yes. From the line of scrimmage to the first down line.
H: And they get four downs, but in the CFL we have three?
M: That's right.
H: And we can see those lines, but the players can't?
M: Correct. It's a video effect.
H: So how do they know how far they have to go?
M: They have flags on the sidelines.
H: You will never, ever convince me this is an interesting game.
M: I know. It's pretty boring.
H: So why do you like it?
M: I have no idea.
H: Ok, bye.
kadenza: (macpc)
Me: So now that Leopard is out, I don't know why I can't find Tiger for cheap.
Him: What do you have?
Me: Panther.
Him: And what's the difference?
Me: I don't know. It's better.
Him: Kind of like... a Liger?
Me: It's pretty much my favourite operating system.

But seriously... I went to the Apple store and even though Leopard just came out, Tiger is actually more expensive ($149 vs $129... WTF).
kadenza: (lowercase n)
Bedroom, early morning

BABY: SCREECH
CATS: AAAAAAH
MARSHALL: Huh? Wah? What time is it?
CLOCK: 5:15, BITCHES
BABY: WAAAH
MARSHALL: It's too early to feed her
HEATHER: Well, any other ideas?
MARSHALL: Um... no?
BABY: zzz

Anyway, we all went to the 3-month checkup yesterday and Nattie recieved another immunization, so she was a bit restless last night but not too bad. It's still better than polio. She is still at the 50th percentile for weight (11 lbs 11 oz), but 75th percentile for length and head circumference. A long, lean and large-brained baby. My husband has created a nerdy but cute spreadsheet and graph, and here's a screencap:
snip )
kadenza: (macpc)
I was cleaning yet more old crap yesterday, and found this charming email transcript between my dad and a potential eBay buyer from Japan from maybe 8 years ago. Before I pitch it, I may as well post it.

Message from buyer:
How do you do. The nickname in eBay is called Doushin. Now, have Apple Lisa 2 which you have sent by eBay sent to Japan -- is there nothing? Of course, by the money order, payment is point-sent and is carried out. It is waiting for a reply.

Reply from seller (dad):
Hello. How do you do. Yes, I have an Apple Lisa 2, and I will be happy to send it to Japan. You will be required to pay the cost of packing and shipping. Payment by money order will be OK.
Thank you.

Reply from buyer:
Hello.
Thank you for an instant reply.
It considers so that Lisa2 can be sent, and I think that it is glad.
Fate is good, and if it can be awarded by me, I will ask of you well.
Thank you.

(he didn't win, but shipping would have been a killer)
kadenza: (?)
Several visitors to our building have commented on our cantankerous evening concierge, Yuri. His English is terrible, and I think it may be shyness rather than unfriendliness that makes him seem so brusque. Trying to converse with him can be quite painful. Alexi the afternoon concierge is also Russian, but much younger and easier to talk to (and quite easy on the eyes, I might add). I know all about his youth in St. Petersburg, his world travels, his night classes, his record collection and his other life as a club DJ. Yuri remains an enigma, though I've known him for maybe five years.

Anyway, Marshie and I had just returned from Christmas dinner and happened to find Yuri in the elevator. He was holding a spoon. The silence as we rode up was so awkward I was about to tell him I liked his spoon, but he suddenly spoke.

Yuri: You need kett?
Me: Uh....?
Yuri: Kett. We find kett in garden. You want kett?
Me: OHHH. No, sorry.
Marshie: We have two already.
Yuri: Ok. Need home for kett. [gets off at lobby]

Now I can add this to my tiny list of things I know about Yuri: He once had a toothache, he has at least one daughter of indeterminate age, and he cares about lost cats in the garden.
kadenza: (aaaaaah)
(discussing an upcoming plane trip and what they're going to do with the cat)

Mum: Well, we can't take Mocha... he would refuse to fly.
Dad: I know, I've tried. Even from the third floor-- nothing.

Quotes

Sep. 29th, 2005 11:26 am
kadenza: (Default)
First off, since everybody's doing it, some choice dialogue from Firefly:

Mal and Jayne (disguised as as husband and wife) are driving a covered wagon being held up by bandits
Bandit: And I think maybe you're gonna give me a little one-on-one time with the missus.
Jayne: Oh, I think you might wanna reconsider that last part. See, I married me a powerful ugly creature.
Mal: How can you say that? How can you shame me in front of new people?
Jayne: If I could make you purtier, I would.
Mal: You are *not* the man I met a year ago.

And now a quote from real life, this morning:

Heather and Marshie are lying in bed
Me: (thinking about Rosh Hashanah) I think I hear the mysterious sound of the sho-fer.
Him: The what?
Me: Sho-fer? The ram's horn thing?
Him: No, no. The chauffeur takes you to temple, where you hear the mysterious sound of the sho-FAR.
Me: Oh, and then what? Is it a happy holiday?
Him: Sure, there's apples dipped in honey. And then, um, there's more apples dipped in honey. It's fun.
Me: And then the shofar? What does that mean?
Him: It's a sign of God's love... of weird people who rip horns off sheep and blow into them.
kadenza: (Carcassonne)
Our flight leaves at about 7:30 tonight, so we've got a bit of time to take care of last-minute details. Marshie is preparing a list of emergency phone numbers (credit card companies, etc).

Him: Who should you call if we lose the R.E.M. tickets?
Me: I dunno... the suicide prevention hotline?
kadenza: (Default)
[lying in bed listening to the news this morning]

me: Um, Marshie... what would you do if I were to, say, lapse into a vegetative state?
him: [silence]
me: You'd pull my plug, wouldn't you! Plug puller!
him: Yes! Yes! I'd pull your plug. I'd have you cremated, and I'd throw your ashes on... um... Michael Stipe's lawn. Because I don't know where the other ones live.
me: I'm glad we had this talk.
kadenza: (Sir Not-Appearing-In-This-Film)
- I ran into a piece of equipment at the gym and now have a very unique bruise on my upper thigh. It's about the size of an egg, purple around the edges, yellow in the middle, and sitting on top of a large lump. I have nicknamed it Mt. Fuji. I wish I could show it to more people, but viewing requires the removal of my pants.

- A reporter from SmartMoney magazine is going to be calling this afternoon to interview me. She's doing an article about the many different means of aquiring concert tickets, and wants to talk to me about my experiences with the fan club. Well, ok. As far as I can tell, it's a real magazine and she's a real journalist.

- I had a short conversation on Thursday at the CNIB with a large Jamaican guy who works in the bindery. I see him all the time, but I've never spoken to him before. He came over to look at my work as I was thermoforming, and spotted last month's unicorn in my box.

him: That's a unicorn, right? They not real.
me: Right. It's a mythological beast.
him: Or so we think. It could be real. We don't know. We don't know nothing!
me: We sure don't.
him: What about the unicycle? It's real.
me: True!
him: But tell that to most people, and they won't believe you.
me: I guess so. No one rides them anymore.
him: They pretty much extinct.

Profile

kadenza: (Default)
Heather

August 2016

S M T W T F S
  1234 56
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
28293031   

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jul. 20th, 2017 06:40 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios